to my blog.
I am a girl named Ryan.
Yes, a girl. Always been one... Will ALWAYS be one. I am also a daughter, sister, wife, mother and graphic designer. I blog here to share the stories of how I can some how manage to be all of those titles & SOMEHOW stay sane. If thats what you call it.
If you need me for anything or have a question about something... please email me at ryanikon@gmailDOTcom.
and about rudeness.
and rudeness
of the week.
fastlane rudeness.
You know when your schedule is so busy you dont even have time to stop and think? And you cant even remember what day it is? But all you know is you have to be somewhere NOW and you have to go to the store NOW and you have to drop off something NOW and you have to GO NOW AND DO NOW AND BE NOW! And OMG! I am in the fastlane, been stuck here for 3 days and I dont think I'm getting out for a couple more days.
and rudeness.
and old rudeness.
and find rudeness.

Just Cuz.
There are many things in life I am grateful for.

1. When I hit a turkey on my way to work, my windshield didn't cave in all the way.
2. When I accidently overdrew my chcking account, the fee was only $15.
3. When my lawnmower broke this summer, it was only $110 to fix. (A NEW one could have been as much as $150.)
4. When I got fired my job last December, I didn't have another one lined up, I had 5 weeks of vacation. Not paid.
5. When the electric company threatened to turn my electric off this Thursday, I only had to pay $191 instead of the $382.28 listed on the disconnection notice.

I mean really. I. am. grateful. I really am. (Do I look convincing?)

My saving grace is knowing that I have the worldest BESTEST, BEST friend there to go through it with me. My. Cuz.

We are nine days apart and might as well have grown up twins. I HEART her. I ADORE her. Without her I wouldn't have made it through all the things I am so grateful for.

She is the one that makes me see the brighter sides of my sarcastic, ungrateful rants of gratefulness.

Thank. God.

Without her my world would have fallen apart a hundred times over. Maybe even THOUSANDS.

Thank you a thousand time over girl, from saving me from myself. You are my one true confidant. My constant in life that helps me refocus on the important things.

Thank you. Just. Cuz.


Posted by and rudeness at 9:20 PM
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100 Things
1. My name is Ryan.
2. I am a girl.
3. I was born a girl.
4. And I plan on always being one.
5. I will die one.
6. Hopefully a old, spunky, not-too-terribly-wrinkled one.
7. With my loving husband.
8. Who gave me the most beautiful baby girl on this planet.
9. Who will ONLY fall asleep in her daddy's arms.
10. And PASS OUT from shear exhaustion in mine.
11. The greatest part about having Ryan as a name, is getting mail that says "Mr. Ryan".
12. What's even funnier is when I get mail for my husband and I that says "Mr. & Mr.".
13. I mean, come on. Can't a girl have a "boy name"?
14. I have actually told people before to put my first name in their databases as Mrs. and my last name as Ryan.
15. You would think I was asking for them to embezzle company monies and wire them to my offshore account.
16. "I don't think I can do that, can I put you on hold while I ask my supervisor?"
18. To ice the cake, I am also a redhead.
19. Oh, and don't forget... a stepdaughter as well.
20. Putting things together?
21. Yes ma'am... I am a redheaded stepchild.
22. And don't think you can make a joke.
23. Cause I have heard them all.
24. So while I have wanted to change my name to something more femanine like Chrissy or Julie and dye my hair black, I have finally come to a realization that has taken years of counseling.
25. I am unique. (Looks in the mirror... yeah that's it... unique.)
26. I am also a graphic designer.
27. A collector of turtles and frogs.
28. A lover of everything stainless steal.
29. Addicted to the smell of a Stargazer Lily.
30. In awe of office supplies. (And the amount of them I have... and the amount of them I still wish to obtain.)
31. There is only ONE thing I ever regretted doing.
32. A connoisseur of the finer things in life.
33. Stickers.
34. Mac-n-Cheese as my ENTIRE meal.
35. But life isn't all fun and games. (Whatever.)
36. I am afraid of being zipped up inside a sleeping bag.
37. Deathly allergic to bananas and latex. And sex.
39. It only takes one.
40. I still lie to my parents.
41. I love getting mail.
42. I stalk the mailman with my eyes as he goes door to door until he gets to my house.
43. Although my mail is only ever junk mail.
44. Or bills.
45. And I hate getting bills.
46. Worse, I hate paying them.
47. I can bake.
48. I can cook. Or as my husband says... experimenting.
49. However, I am good at messing things up in the kitchen.
50. Just so you know, if it says 375 for 30 minutes that DOES NOT mean that 475 for 15 minutes works out properly.
51. Baking soda and baking powder AREN't the same thing.
52. Always remember to add salt when it says to.
53. Always.
54. No exceptions.
55. I was a military brat. (Does that title really ever go away?)
56. Which let me experience 13 schools in 12 years.
57. I have been to 44 states and lived in 5 of them.
58. Six states if you count C O N F U S I O N.
59. Apparently, I also think that I am pretty damn funny.
60. Others don't always agree.
61. I have a problem with mixing up words horribly, which does turn out to be pretty funny.
62. Although I don't find it too funny.
63. Figures.
64. You mean it isn't a magazine or newspaper prescription?
65. Calculating graphulator instead or Graphic Calculator.
66. Down-posit instead of Down Payment.
67. Gradulations instead of Congratulations.
68. Glove Department instead of compartment.
69. Nothing like having dyslexia... when you TALK. Makes for great professionalism.
70. I am a freak when it comes to my lawn.
71. I am the only one that can mow it.
72. No one else can mow it the way I like.
73. My husband loves this fact.
74. But I am one of "those" that cuts it one way this time and the other way the next time.
75. I can hardly stand myself if I forgot which way I went last week.
76. Then my universe spins out of control.
77. But that's why God made chocolate.
78. Chocolate and I have been having an affair for a looong time.
79. I say affair, cause I feel the need when eating to hide it from everyone.
80. I sneak chocolate.
81. We love each other.
82. We are going to runaway someday together.
83. The fastest mile I ever ran was 7 minutes and 4 seconds.
84. Today, it takes me that long to smoke a cigarette.
85. Which is probably why I don't run anymore.
86. Damnit.
87. But we all have our own addictions.
88. Which brings me back to my husband.
89. Who introduced me to the world of gaming.
90. Yes girls, those games you hate your men to play.
91. I am hooked.
92. C R A C K A D D I C T E D.
93. My husband is the happiest man on the planet because of it.
94. Cause I know when he says he needs to "Finish up a round." I understand that I won't see him for 6 days.
95. And I am okay with it.
96. He would do the same for me.
97. Cause he knows he never has to mow the lawn.
98. Or shovel in the winter.
99. Cause "It's all me" when it comes to that.
100. It's ALWAYS all about me.
Posted by and rudeness at 2:44 PM
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and Flickr.
and prior rudeness.
and daily rudeness.
and cool rudeness.
My site was nominated for Best Parenting Blog!
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